So,... it seems at least once a month I see or hear about a blogger or an article, usually by women by sometimes by men pointing out just how bad comic books and worse, fans of comics are or can be to women. And they are correct. But what surprises me is just how many people speak about it. Some examples in comics for people that may not know is pretty much just how women are drawn. They are drawn as objectified sex objects most of the time: giant boobs, tiny waists, nice facial features. I read or did read Marvel comics quite a bit and I can't recall a fat or even a plain looking female character. Guys get off easier, most are heroic but some are ugly or not male model types. Wolverine I would suggest is a prime example. So it's not a level playing field.

I consider myself first and foremost a gamer. To me, a gamer is a person that plays games. I tend to have more credence to those that play role-playing games or specialized board games or even Magic the Gathering. To me, a gamer is more someone I would see at a gaming convention. I have lots of friends that play XBox or Playstation that pretty much laugh off Dungeons & Dragons or Magic the Gathering. So, to me, those folks aren't quite the definition of gamer in my opinion.

By my definition, many gamers are also comic book fans. My friends use to own a comic book store and we would regularly see the comic book/gamers as opposed to just a comic reader. All in all, both segments were some of the nicest people I have ever met. But like anything else, the are dickheads and dirtbags as well.

Here's how this relates to comic book conventions and other such things. Again, the vast majority of comic book readers that I have meet are nice people. But even nice people do stupid things. And sexual harassment is a very valid concern. The rules of conduct as I understand them at a comic book con are pretty simple: treat people, all people with respect. Do not touch anybody without their consent. Do not make lewd suggestions to anybody. I would think that should pretty much cover it but I might be missing something that's just escaping me at the moment.

But there is reality. Guys do stupid things around women. Their brains can go right out the window. For a long time and in some places I would gather that it is still the normal that comic book guys are geeks, nerds, socially inept, don't know how to react around girls, and many other social shortcomings. The Big Bang Theory in part plays this for big laughs. In a repeat episode I recently watched Penny calls Howard creepy and essentially socially inept. The live crowd actually goes pretty quiet as the Penny character dresses down  Howard and Howard leaves the scene clearly dejected. Penny refuses to back off telling the rest of the gang that it is the truth. Later, she is goaded into apologizing which she does. Howard takes it to heart and tries to kiss Penny and she belts him in the nose. I found it pretty funny. It's funny because it's safe. You like the characters and know that Penny has the power to stop Howard who once again has over-stepped his bounds. But if this scene played out in real life, I wonder how many people would really be laughing.

So yes, I am defending guys here. I am defending the loutish behavior towards women but I want to clarify which guys I'm defending. I'm not defending the guy that's a jerk. I'm not defending the guy that's going to treat women as lesser beings no matter where the social event is happening. I want to be clear that I am defending the nerd. That guy that has been picked on his whole life, that guy that is weird because as a young adult he still reads comic books and plays Dungeons & Dragons, that guy that doesn't catch the eye of the woman he longs for because he's fat or scrawny and probably has no chance at getting a hot girl because he has under-developed social skills, the guy that has little to no interaction with the female species.

I'm saying every stereo-type has some truth to it. Is it a big surprise when a woman, any woman but especially someone that is attractive, dressed in costume at a con get harassed? Zero tolerance would be a wonderful thing but it doesn't happen.

A woman can have a powerful effect on a man. Even something as simple as a smile can cause problems. To a lonely guy, a socially inept guy, or a guy desperate for acceptance, especially from a female, a simple smile can be grossly mistook as an invitation for more interaction or even the facade of the girl having real interest in nerd. Then the guy blows it by telling his life story in the 10 seconds he has to impress the girl before she walks off to the next attending fans who would like a picture of her excellently crafted costume.

The women are not the problem. The costumes are not the problem. But a guy lacking in social skills can misinterpret and make himself believe there is something there when a total stranger is merely showing kindness to a fellow human being. That's the power a woman can have over a man. 

I attend a convention called DragonCon. It's huge: takes up 4 hotels, has upwards of 70,000 or more people packed into said hotels and tons and tons of people in great costumes of all sorts. Statistically, something bad is bound to happen. There's so many people, lots of attractive people and many wear costumes. They do not ask for harassment, the costume they are wearing does not equal consent of anything, but shit happens. There are going to be horror stories. 

Like it or not, I think we can all agree that comic books are a male dominated field. I believe I heard something startling like DC Comics has something like 3% of its creative workforce being female. Think about that. The presence of women creators in the second biggest comic book company in the U.S. is virtually non-existent. I've heard computer gaming companies as an industry are pretty much the same. Is there any wonder why there is a problem? 

So that's my rant. There are always going to be douche bags that treat women like crap. They are in every facet of life including comics. But I'm also saying there are guys that make bad choices because this is the only venue where their fantasies might, well - not really in all likelihood, but might come true. And they lose sight of the proper path to get there.